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WELCOME TO MY PREGNANCY PAGE!!

Cake from the shower with pics of proud parents (dad on left, mom on right)!

I discovered that I am pregnant on April 11, 2005. This was unplanned and completely unexpected but it is still a blessing none the less.

My first doctor's visit was April 11, 2005, my second visit was May 9 and my next, third, visit will be June 6. I had an ultrasound on April 11 which determined that I was 5 weeks at the time and I was able to see the heartbeat! As of today, I am 13 weeks, which means I am officially in the second trimester!

I was quite nauseated and definitely tired during my first trimester. I feel much better now since the placenta has fully formed and taken over much of the job my body was having to do! I have outgrown most of my pants and definitely all of my bras! LOL. I am not in "maternity" clothes per se, I am just in size 8's and a few 10's now. I am not trying to buy any more new clothes because I do not plan to stay this size! I have a few Sorors and friends of the family who are going to let me borrow some clothes.

This will be the first grandchild for my family. My parents and sisters are excited. I am getting used to the change and rearranging my life schedule as best as I can. No more selfish me!!

May 28: My belly button is starting to disappear. It is getting pretty shallow and wide! I just hope it does not pop out. I really don't like the look of that!!

June 13: My belly button is still doing its disappearing act. I am getting fat! I now weigh in at a incredible 150. I am still in disbelief. People stare at me. I hate that. Of course my vanity leads me to believe that it is because I look fat and not that they are checking my pregnant belly out. I need to get over myself. "I am not fat, I am pregnant!"
My last doctor's appointment was a big disappointment. She did a rush job on me I think. I am not one for touching but "I feel like" she has not touched me enough! I need her to poke and prod and do doctor things... ask me how this and that feels. Nothing. Just "Oh...you gained 6 pounds over the past month...eat some bananas and come see me in two weeks! Peace!" I did get to hear the baby's heart though! That was great. I am not sure how fast it was beating (another item she forgot to mention). I will put the video up. I go back to get my AFP test done next week (blood drawn...no!!!) and then my big ultrasound in 3 weeks to make sure all is well and hopefully figure out the gender. That is what I really want to know, so I can plan! I am not one for patience!
Anyway, my feelings about this pregnancy...hmmm...let me see... My gums bleed at the sight of my toothbrush, food has lost its taste, my nose is stuffed up, Mt. Everest and Sinai have taken up residence on my face, I sweat like a pig in heat walking through the desert and my temper has gone to zero tolerance BUT it is great! Oh yeah...I have serious love handles and back fat...ewwwwwww....

June 21: My belly button is still working its way towards nothingness. Indigestion is my enemy now. I am addicted to tums and fiber chewables. LOL. I had my third appointment this past Monday and it was pretty much the same as the second. Blood drawn for the AFP test (new thing) and the usual blood pressure, heartbeat and weight followed by a quick Q&A. I am switching doctor's because I think my current doctor is not board certified. I don't want to have to drive all the way out to no man's land but...I have to go where I feel comfortable because this is not a situation to be handled without much care. I have my BIG U/S on July 1 where I get to find out the gender of the baby!! Yea!! But I have to hope that the baby is cooperative and spreads them legs! LOL. All I have to do is drink 16 oz. of water one hour prior to my hour long exam and hold it! Great!

June 24: One word....CELLULITE!!! Help me!! I started walking yesterday at the behest of most....I have some terrible evil crotch pain (ECP - round ligament pain) and some bad back pain! I thought exercise was supposed to help!! Maybe it takes a while to set in. I will give it two weeks and then I shall decide whether it is a habit to stay or one to go! I do want to be a sexy mama but not if it means ECP and back pain!!

July 1: It a.....____!! You have to sign the guestbook to find out! LOL. I am sorry people. Suspense is what I do! The ultrasound was nice. I had to get up to urinate 4 times due to the huge amount of water that I had to drink for a 3 second view of my cervix but....oh well. All is good so I need not worry! I was able to see the baby in 2D,3D and 4D!! Baby is definitely a mover! The technician had a hard time getting baby to stay still for any good pictures at first and then baby hid it's face but was still! We got many good pictures from the back and a halfway good profile pic in 3D. I do not ever want to have to hold my bladder that long again in life! I thought I was going to have to walk out bare bottom because I was not staying in some pee-pee pants!!! TMI, I know...but all discretion with my body will be out the window soon enough so...get used to it! My next doctor's visit is in 2 weeks with a new doctor. Hopefully this one will have a u/s in office and I can get a view everytime I visit. Enjoy the site people! U/S pics will be up soon.

July 2: Wow peeps! 190 page views yesterday alone! I am glad to see that people took me up on my offer of suspense! 676 views this month alone! Great! I love the internet. I guess I will chronicle my life in 'blog' form from now on with little bits of mystery for people to keep up with me! This is great. Baby says thanks for finding so much interest in it's genitalia!!

July 4: Oh Beautiful... yada, yada. Happy 4th!! I had 3 terrible nightmares last night...another "side effect" of pregnancy. I will not repeat them because they were truly horrible. I just want to sleep and have nice dreams! Anyway, I think I finally felt the baby move. It feels like....excuse me people, gas but without the ....ummmmm, actual gas. That is the best explanation I can give. I feel it on one side (my right side) mostly but occasionally I feel it on the left too. It is my belief that it is the baby because I always feel it when there is a loud noise (I went to the movies and I guess the dolby digital thing scared the baby). Or, when I try to lie on my tummy, the baby moves. I guess baby doesn't like that...it hurts me too now anyway. :( No more tummy or back spread eagle sleeping; only fetal positions. I always get back aches sleeping on my side and I scratch myself for some odd reason. I think I need to sleep on my hands to keep them away from my face. Anyway, my stomach itches like crazy due to my skin s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g. Talk about looking funny. Walk around at work scratching your stomach and see what kind of stares you get. They range from disgust to embarrassment. Hey people, I have something inside me making me do all of these unlady like things!! It is not something I WANT to do to gross you out....It is something that I am compelled to do due to the life force that beats within!! I CAN NOT HELP IT!!! I itch! I have gas! I am no longer pH balanced! I sweat! I fall asleep during your soliloquies! I CAN NOT HELP IT!! Sorry...I had to vent. Have a great day!!
P.S. I want my body back....I will be happy with it and treat it right this go around God, I promise!!

July 5: I think the tiredness is trying to creep back up on me. I am not sure if it is due to extra activities or if it is due to the life force that drains me from within! I had to get another hot chocolate/coffee mix today to keep me going at work. I am trying to keep the things I am not supposed to have (coffee) to a minimum but I also need to make sure that I keep my income at its maximum! LOL. Baby gots to eat and they can't eat corn everyday for every meal like I can! Oh Lord, what am I going to do?!?!? I barely feed myself well enough to sustain a healthy lifestyle. I have been cooking more to feed my undying hunger though. But that is limited. My increasing fat layers have me sweating at the thought of heat so I try to stay away from the kitchen. I have found a new love too... marshmallow mania fruity pebbles! OMG....it is sooooooo good! I get the calcium I need and a good sugar rush! Even though I am sure the sugar adds to my weight gain. Can you tell that my weight is an issue for me?!?!? I swear these love handles are growing at the same rate as my belly. I have a straight shot of my belly that I will upload once I get it off the digi. That way you all can see my ever-growing massive midsection. I promise....I think there is an extra baby hiding somewhere in there. My mom has me believing that now. I couldn't button my pants back after lunch today. I went to the potty and they came off but they would not go back on. That was an issue for a moment. I am sure someone probably thought I was in there sewing a new pair as I tried to rearrange my pants under my belly to button them. Ever tried getting those fancy pants closed when you can't see them?!?!? Not even fun. I am still swearing off of maternity clothes as much as possible. I weigh 155. I would have never thought that I would weigh anywhere past 145 at the absolute most. Now...I am 155 with no where but up to go over the next forever months. My mom says that once my belly surpasses my breasts I can start to complain about how big I am getting. At the rate of growth...I think it will be a close race, like the tortoise and the hare. It will happen though. I need to make sure I set my lacies aside...two weeks until week 20...the halfway mark and my 5th lunar month which means another belly gallery photo. Ok...*YAWN*...9:30 pm....bed time.

July 9: Yes, I am famous!! A journal entry all the way from HONG KONG!! JP, you know you have to come back to the U.S. and make sure that baby is fully bilingual since I am not!! Then baby can teach me!! Thanks for putting me and baby on the map! I feel sooooo special! Now on to the good stuff...I feel sick. I am not sure if it is morning sickness coming back to haunt me or what. I never feel like eating but I do because I can starve me but not a child. What do you call those things...biology term people....they things that live off of something else...yes! Parasites (Thanks daddy, my mind is off)!! I feel like I have a parasite that is taking me over!! I am not being negative....I am just trying to put it all into perspective for everyone, especially the ladies out there who have not had the pleasure! I am not me anymore! KMF is GONE! I am a carrier for a baby and that is it! My mind is gone, my body is way the heck out in left field, my emotions are all over the globe (I had enough trouble keeping myself in tact before...I am not even close to control now), I am a baby making machine!
I am retaining water. Alot of it. I fell asleep at my desk the other day for about 15 minutes before lunch...when I woke up I had a complete sweater, hair band, bracelet imprint on my right side of my face that stayed in place for an hour and a half! Luckily my boss never saw me!!

July 12: Wow! The postcards made it to the south but none of the ones right here in MD have been delivered! I am unsure what that is about....DC/MD/VA are checking their mail a little too much. I keep getting comments on how big I am getting...I know those are supposed to be "compliments" but what women wants to hear they are getting big! LOL. Mommies, I guess!! Anyway, I pray that everyone receives their postcards in a timely fashion and without too many bends and folds from our lovely USPS. I made sure to get the good postcards from Staples so, please, by all means feel free to post them on your fridges, wall of photos, pictures books, dashboards, desks, or any other place close to your mind, heart and soul. They are also available for download on this page. Feel free to add baby or a belly pic to your desktop or as your screensaver! Just pick a flattering pic....not the one with the jelly rolls! LOL. Thank you everyone for signing the journal! Love you all! New belly pic next week, yea!!!

July 13: Will someone please tell this child to stop practicing for the Olympics Tumbling Team in my tummy! I am trying to get some work done and I feel like I have an octopus going crazy in me! A little octopus, yes, but none the less an octopus! It is not as scary as I thought but I do think it will take some getting used to. It feels like gas except for the fact that there is no relief from it! It keeps going in wake and sleep cycles I guess. Anyway, it is storming and the power may go out. Baby wants me to nap on the job and it would be easier to do that if the power goes out. I would never do that if I was not hosting another life form; it is unethical. But now..., like I said before, discretion and ethics are out the window!

July 21: Hello all! I am back again! As some of you know, last week and the beginning of this one were quite hectic for me! I had to take some time off from my usual work day hours but since I did not want to use my leave I had to come in to make it up! I worked two twelve hour days and I worked this past Saturday...never again unless there is no other way! I am tired. I have been trying to get on here to put on some short updates but for some reason I was unable to get in my tripod account to make any changes. Either Big Brother is watching me or Tripod was down. Who knows. My site was still working though so no complaints.
Well, I had a doctor's appointment with my new doctor yesterday. The offices are nice, the doctor is nice, the staff is okay... LOL. Anyway, I got the results from my AFP test and the results are looking great! Also the doctor looked over the ultrasound and she said baby is doing great in that area (growth) too. I am measuring right on point for my due date (fundus height or uterus size for those non-pregnancy talk people) and my cervix is thick and firm whatever that means. I know it is good but it just sounds bad. She was also pleased with my pelvic bone structure. I have always been told I had some "childbearing hips" I just hope they really do allow for some easy childbearing! LOL.
Also, just as a disclaimer to all who may think I have a negative outlook on motherhood....I don't! I have realized that I am a very selfish person and it takes time to get used to the fact that someone is taking over your body! I can take someone taking over my space or my things...I have enough sisters to be used to someone being in something of mine at all times but when it is someone or something actually taking over your BODY...now that takes a whole other outlook! I get kicked daily (and supposedly it gets worse!), I have to urinate hourly, I feel faint if I don't eat bi-hourly, I am always constipated even though I try not to be, I am eating meat (especially pork for some reason) like never before, I fall asleep in odd situations when I want to be awake, I can't walk too long or I look like I have tree stubs for legs, my breasts have huge blue veins in them that are nasty visible so I look like I shoot up in my chest, I can't breathe due to stuffiness and I am not sick, My skin peels off of me in weird places, I have a few mountains on my face which erupt one by one to form constellations of white and red marks, I sweat even when I am cold, etc., etc., etc. I am a baby making machine and nothing more but EXCUSES...are not for me! MOTHERHOOD is GREAT! But the journey is long and tiresome. Isn't that most situations that are priceless in the end?!?!?

July 26: It is HOT! Why must I have to endure this heat when my body is already an easy bake oven?!?! Atleast I do not have to go outside alot and I get to park in a garage during the day. I can not stand the heat! Silly me went and got some hot chocolate though. I was falling asleep as usual. I am going to update more tonight, including some pictures!! Yea! Wait 'til I show you this!!

July 27: So, last night I got home and fell asleep after I ate, therefore nothing was put up. I apologize. The pictures are up now though. Take no offense to my fashion spread or the horrible outfit choices! My baby sister thought these outfits (the weird ones) were 'cute'. I will let you all decide! LOL. I was about to go out of the house one night in the striped pants and polka dot shirt but I decided not to draw more attention to myself! I have gained 27 pounds so far when I was in the overweight category already meaning that I should have only gained 15-20 pounds not the usual 25-35 pounds. Anyway, since someone did not email me my pictures when I asked them to, I was a little late starting this so it is now past my bedtime. I need to get my 10 hours in! Take care everyone!! Oh yeah, someone stole my favorite lacies to keep me out of them in my photo shoot I think. I will buy some more! Lacies forever! Forgive the substitutes, they aren't cute. :(

August 2: My time on the computer gets shorter every night it seems. I get home and just do not want to be around a computer after sitting in front of one at work all day. That is a major thing for me! I love computers! On to business...
As I type, little one is having a ball doing something. What, I have no idea. I would like to find out though. I wish I could see what is going on that requires so much movement! I swear there are atleast 2 babies inside of me the way I get punched and kicked everywhere from my ribs, my back, my sides, my belly button on down to my bladder. I know it only gets worse. Once the room starts to get tighter, it is going to be a twisting turning let me get comfy battle. I am not sure how I am supposed to work through all of that.
Turning over in bed is getting to be a chore. I can't just flip over by getting up on my elbows and flipping to my other side. I have to go the back way. That takes longer, I end up getting caught in my sheets, and usually, I wake up fully so I have to wait to get back to sleep which means I usually have to get up and go to the bathroom which means more time awake which means I sleep later and get to work late. Usually I am sleepy at work due to my sleep-wake-sleep-wake schedule.
THIS CHILD! I have no idea what requires this much movement! I have no idea what parts of the body are bumping me with such force but goodness! After I eat, baby gets to moving. When I wake up baby, gets to moving. When I put the prenatal learning system on, baby gets to moving. When I drive, baby gets to moving. Once I get to settled down to watch tv or rest, baby starts moving!! I rub and rub and rub my belly to try and get the baby to calm down but that just must be a game because usually the movement picks up! Can you imagine someone tapping you on your bladder??!?!? When you have to pee!?!?!? That just makes it even more urgent. Remember when your siblings or friends used to push on your stomach when you had to go? Imagine that but like 5 times worse because of the more direct contact. Bad!
I am now getting to the point where I am fearing the birth process. I am trying not to. I want to be able to relax and 'enjoy' the experience. I am going to try and be drug free but we shall see. I know many people are doubtful...but, ask me after the birth and I will let you know how I feel/felt then. Just pray that I can do it because I don't want to be on auto-pilot for my child's entry into the world! I need to see this person who is beating me up on the inside immediately following their entry into this world!

August 7: So, this weekend our family reunion is in Baltimore... Wow. It has been a time, I tell you. Family is funny. We went to the hotel for the big meet and greet Friday night and then we went on a boat ride to this "quaint" town yesterday. Today is the beach! My great aunt who has been up here three times over the past three months made a comment about me needing to "lose some weight" on her second visit up here. She saw me Friday and called me over and whispered, "I didn't know you was expecting." LOL. Yeah, you called me fat and told me to lose some weight last month, remember auntie?!??! As I am showing more, I feel like people want to put me in the handicap community. The older people call me over to sit with them and wait on the elevators with them and eat soft foods with them and ... basically do all of the things they do so that I will not "strain myself". I am constantly fed broccoli. Everyday some kind of dish is put in my face. I like it but I don't need anything else adding to my constipation issues.
Next issue ... For some reason stressful situations make me sick! I am not sure if it is the elevated blood flow that really makes me feel bad once my adrenaline gets going or if it is the overwhelming feeling of helplessness since I can not move as fast anymore. Everyday stress makes me want to cry! Hormones as well as the helpless feeling as well as the horrible feeling I get in my chest make me feel like going in a shell to repair and rest!
Baby is enjoying the free time still. Going wild in me and then sleeping. I am getting used to the kicks. I can deal with them anytime except after I get eat. It makes me feel like all of my food is ready to come back out! Only 16 weeks left and then I get to start the uphill battle of refirming my body along with taking care of baby. I found a stretch mark on the underside of my right cheek the other day. I pray that it disappears! I want everything to go back to normal or better! I have some major work to do! Anyway, I am trying to get another ultrasound so I can see baby once more before the grand arrival. We shall see. Nobody wants to do one for free!! I am rambling, I need to bathe and head on out to the beach. Holler!

August 11: I just saw my stomach jump. That is freaky. I was taking a break after venturing from the bathroom for the seventh or eighth time today and once I sat down my stomach jumped. Wow. My officemate is gone so I pulled my shirt up and watched my tummy as it jumped about 5 other times in 3 different places. I guess that means I am getting closer to the point where I see a foot or elbow go across my stomach. Scary!
I am so tired. I took my prenates but I still need some more something I guess. I just want to sleep all day!
Before I forget, my sisters got me to wear my bikini to the beach. Of course I kept my clothes on but you could see my big yellow bikini bottom through my white capris. I got in the water for a little while, until a young girl close to us got stung by a jellyfish. It was cue for us to get out of that dirty bay water! How can I explain to baby that I got stung by a jellyfish playing in dirty jelly water and then expect obedience when I say get out the water! LOL. I have to be smarter than the average bear and a tad bit more cautious. I am so ready to go home. I need the weekends to be closer together and a little longer. I think we go look at houses this weekend. Hopefully we can find a place that has 6 or 7 bedrooms and at least 5 bathrooms so baby can have a separate space from me! I want to keep my electronics in my room! I will keep baby in there too until we get to the point where we sleep through the night. I guess I could rearrange it all. I need more space anyway. I have mommy things to do now as well as the other stuff I do!
I am going to watch my tummy some more and then I will get back to work.

August 15: I am going to stop trying to hide the gender from everyone now. It is too hard to have to watch what I say! It is a girl everyone! I am thinking of the names Jaidan Mikell (pronounced like my middle name) or Mikell (pronounced like the infamous pop singer's first name) Michelle with a hyphenated last name since I don't plan to change my last name or at the very most, I plan to hyphenate my last name. I was born into this world with a certain name and I am going to go out with it in tact. Unless I go crazy, then I have to eat my words and change my child's birth certificate! LOL. I know that Michael is a 'boys' name and that Jaidan is ambiguous and if you know me, you know, that is my goal! I am name biased. Sue me. Baby girl will get used to it and no one will make fun of her! Besides, Madison and McKenzie are way too popular per the 2003 most chosen names poll. I am sure that things have not changed much since then.
My tummy continues to jump more and more each day as baby girl gets bigger. Also, I get more and more tired everyday as baby girl gets bigger. I had to take a nap yesterday as I tried to flat-iron my hair because I was so exhausted halfway through the process. My back was hurting, I was sweating from the heat and I swear I was not getting the normal amount of oxygen into my body as I held my hands up over my head. I told my mother that I am not washing my hair anymore until after birth! Getting up to the sink to wash it is almost impossible due to my semi-big belly. Also, flat-ironing less than a foot of hair should not take 3 hours! Moving on...
Let's go over my menu for the day so you all can get a pretty good idea of how much and how often I HAVE to eat.
Snack (on the drive in to work): Nectarine
First Breakfast (once I get to work): Bowl of mac and cheese
Second Breakfast (after I work for about two hours): Bowl of rasin bran with soy milk
Snack: Diced peaches and a handful of salt and vinegar chips
Lunch: Leftover baked chicken breasts, more mac and cheese and an orange soda
Snack: More diced peaches
Snack (on the drive home): Nectarine
Dinner: More leftover chicken breast and cooked veggies
Snack/Dessert: Red velvet cake
Of course, in between all of this is water, water and more water!!
S-T-R-E-T-C-H M-A-R-K-S are appearing more and more! I thought I was going to make it without getting that many on my extremities but I guess the damage was done and it just took a while for it to reach up to the outer layer of skin. It looks like I have short black worms living under my skin and like they left trails. Down the front of my thighs, on the bottom curve of my buttocks, on my hips and on my lower sides. Thank you JESUS, I don't have a single one on my tummy! My belly button looks like it has lips though. LOL. It looks like it is waiting for someone to put some lip stick on it! Pucker up! It was sore but now it feels fine. Pray that no stretch marks appear on my belly. I need to save one part of my body from the worm race!
I had my hand resting on my belly last night as I was heading to sleep and I woke up with Miss Thing kicking/punching/headbutting it! I guess she wanted me to get off of her. Not like my hand is heavy or anything. Every time I wake up in the wee hours of the AM and she is awake, a feeling of dread come over me. That means that she will be awake at 2 AM after she is born! Yikes. I need sleep more than ever. I was addicted to sleep before and I am even more so addicted to sleep now. I don't even let studies rob me of too much sleep! What am I going to do with her at 2 AM beside fall asleep while she is breastfeeding?!?!? I am going to have to strap her to me so I will not fall asleep and have her roll off of my lap. Is that possible?!?! Will I develop some sort of superhuman power that keeps me awake for 72 hours stretches with no final exam on the horizon?!!? Does a baby make you feel that burst of sudden energy like a final exam!??! I hope so for her sake...

August 22: It has been an interesting couple of days. First let me start with an experience from last week. I was wearing a cute little (figuratively speaking) summer dress feeling good. As I walked out of the office on the way home, I saw one of my co-workers with whom I had not spoken in a while. I approached and a conversation began. We discussed the baby, work, future plans, etc. I was outside all of 10 minutes with him and not feeling overly hot at all. Then, all of a sudden, I felt something tickling my leg. I thought at first that it is just a thread so I brushed my hand past the end of my dress to move it and carried on the conversation. A minute or so later I felt the tickle again. This time I felt it go from my thigh to the back of my knee on down towards my calf... Yes people! It was sweat running down my leg from my butt cuff! I grabbed the back of my dress and tried to dry as much as I could and then I started to "calmly" cut the conversation off while trying to figure out how I could walk away without him having to see the sweat that had made its way into my sandal. As I walked away I placed my hand on my tummy and realized that the front of my dress was completely soaked too! I had no idea that I was sweating at all! Not that much atleast. That was embarassing. Thanks baby girl!
Fast forward to today... I have had a slight stuffiness, cold kind of feeling the past couple of days. Well today, it broke out into a stay your big behind in bed type of thing but of course I had to go to work because I need maternity leave (any government person want to donate some leave?) and I need the cash flow. Well, I get to work and call the doctor to find out what I can take and the doctor tells me psuedofed or 'tussin. I had them fax a note over to me and I took it down to the nurse unit at work. When I get there they do the standard check on me. Once they get all of my vitals, they start freaking out about early labor asking me if I am feeling contractions, etc. I have no idea what contractions feel like so I start freaking out and then the baby gets some of my adrenaline and she start freaking out and the nurse tells me to go home immediately. She is adamant that I go home get in bed with a pitcher of water next to me and wait for my lymph nodes to unblock. I go back to my office and call my mother who tells me that there is no one home and suggests that maybe I should not go home since I would be alone just in case but who the heck is around here for a "just in case" where I can go lay down and rest?!?!? I have to drive myself to the hospital in a "just in case" situation! Needless to say, I hung out around my office for an hour and then slowly made my way home. I slept for a bit and now I am sitting up and decided to add this experience to the site. I have some pics too. I may have to add those later though. I need my sisters machine.
But, what everyone comes here for...baby update! She is still moving around quite a bit, which I am happy for. She is definitely getting stronger. It almost feels like she is playing with my spine sometimes. That and my right pelvic bone are her favorites. She kicks me in the belly still, that is a standard. I think we are settled on the name Jaidan Mikell for her. Some people have an issue with Mikell Michelle since "Mikell" is a "boys name". Let me interject...I honestly get tired of people's opinion sometimes. Notice I did not say I get tired of advice, helpful hints, etc. I get tired of people's personal opinions. But, for some reason, this baby growing in me causes people to think that they have a personal say so in her or my life in some way. That is not the case! I prefer Jaidan Mikell, luckily, for those who interjected their personal opinion. Anyway, Jaidan Mikell says goodbye until next time!

August 23: Jaidan and I are off to Texas!! More updates and pictures when we return!! The digital is packed and charged!

August 26: We are back from Texas for the time being. We will be returning on September 8th if the doctor says it is okay. Jaidan DID NOT like the plane ride at all!! LOL. She moved the whole 2 hours and 44 minutes! She was obviously disturbed by the new feeling and the sounds I guess. I was in pain on the way down there due to my cold. My head was killing me and I could not sleep because I could not breathe. On the way back home, I had to change seats on the plane because the little girl sitting beside me decided to snatch her mother's perfume from her purse and spread it all over her body! I was about to gag and pass out! I gave her the most evil look and then I felt bad because she looked sorry but I was not very happy at all. I was in the window seat and I felt trapped. There were stinky men in the rows in front of and behind me. I was trapped by the sweet-funk of my environment. I had to wait until the plane doors closed to see what seats were open so I could move. Of course I had to go all the way to the back. But things got worse from there...they ran out of sandwiches on the plane and guess who was the sole person to not eat...ME! Do you think anyone around me said, here, have my sandwich hungry pregnant lady!?!?!? NO!! I cried for like 20 minutes because I was so hungry and mad! The steward kept offering me juice or soda. That made me cry more. I wanted food!! I finally drank some cranberry juice and went to sleep.
When we got to the airport, there was two guys looking at me as I was walking down the hall then next thing I know they are behind me. I was so scared. What the heck did they want?!?! I think I am more aware of my mortality at this point. Not that they were going to do something horrible to me in the airport, but still. Even if they were just trying to "holler", that is just nasty. I am pregnant for goodness sake! Leave me alone unless your name is FLL!
On another note, I will not complain about heat up here anymore, TEXAS IS HOT AS HADES! I was a full fledged sweat ball and my clothes were reduced to sweat rags. I was sweating even inside buildings in the AC! The humidity was horrible and it seems like it was inside every building. My hair reverted in a matter of no time. I will make sure I am better prepared next time. I will pack my skimpiest pregnant lady clothes!
Last tidbit before I go, baby girl got a letter from her father yesterday, as I read it to her she started kicking and flipping! This little girl is getting her own personality! I may be crazy and it may have had nothing to do with the letter, but it made me cry none the less! Okay, let me take my crybaby behind off of here now! Take care everyone! Six month picture update on Monday the 29th!

August 30: Yes, I know it is the 30th and that there is not a new picture up! If you only knew how my day went yesterday, you would understand! Let me tell you all about the doctor's appointment first...
I finally was able to squeeze in an appointment with my chosen OB. He is GREAT! I have to give him a round two before I say too much but that first visit was awesome! Thank you to those who helped me to get to him because after the first two doctors, I needed someone like him to renew my faith in bedside manner! The nurse on the other hand, I could do without. She is mean as far as I am concerned and I really don't need someone barking at me. I have enough emotional strain as is. Anyway, I received my first bit of bad news. I really need to cut down on what I do and my sodium intake. I am retaining too much water. He told me to basically stay inside and lay down when I am not doing anything that requires me to be in any other position. I was also told to drown myself with water to try and help flush the water out of me. I don't get it, but I will do it! I drank 104 oz. yesterday between 7 AM and 11 PM and today I have had about 72 oz. I think I will get in another 32 oz. before I go to sleep. Now, yes, I know I could literally drown myself but I am taking precaution. I only add when there is some that has been "abandoned"! LOL.
At the next visit I get to do the famed gestational diabetes glucose screening/test. I have to drink this orange drink, that looks pretty tasty, 30 minutes before I get there and then I have to have my blood drawn on the hour. I have heard that the drink is nasty! That is not my concern though. I am more so concerned about knowing the exact minute when I will have to relinquish some more of my precious ruby red vitality juice! I don't want any more blood drawn ever! Leave it with me! GOD WANTS ME TO HAVE IT!! I know I have "excess" right now but it is serving some kind of purpose. I have to feed the stretch marks and the baby! LOL.
I did find my lacies for those who were concerned! They were hidden in one of my travel bags....I wonder how they got there when I have not traveled?!?! The world will never know. Anyway, don't fret, I will shimmy into them soon and get another picture of my pouting belly for the belly gallery.
Jaidan is doing fine. Kicking harder each day and on track with her growth spurt. Sometimes you can feel a little head or a little bum sticking out as she does her thing in there. I have not felt the infamous hiccups yet but that doesn't mean that I won't! There is still much time...94 days to go...
I need to sign up for childbirth classes. I am scared. I have to somehow get this baby out of me. Wow. Let that sink in for a moment people. It goes in like a banana and comes out like a pineapple, right?!!? Someone said that or I read it somewhere and it really doesn't hit home until you are faced with it. Ummm....I can't speak anymore on it....I need a moment to myself....
Okay, I am back. Interesting fact I learned yesterday at the doctor's office: as I inquired about the severe nipple sensitivity that I am experiencing the doctor told me the famous "you're pregnant" excuse/reason. Supposedly, women's breast never complete development unless they have children. Interesting, huh?!?!? So, women with no children have immature num-nums. I, on the other hand, now have fully mature ones along with my other mothers of the world. Now, besides the fact that my nipples have virtualy tripled in size, they stand at attention with much more vigor and strength, and they will eventually squirt milk, I don't see what makes them that much more mature. Actually, I guess that is enough to make them more mature. The pain of an erect pregnancy nipple is not good though. It wakes me at night if I don't wear a sports bra but it is too hot to wear a sports bra. I thought maybe something was wrong with me but supposedly all of that is normal. Now, if breastfeeding hurts worse than that erect nipple pain...what is I gon' do?!?!?
I am anxiously awaiting this birth and thanking God for each long 24 hour day that keeps me separated from the pain. I need to get over myself. Until next time...

September 1: Wow, it is September. Soon it will be October, and then it will be my birthday. Then it will be November, and then it will be Freddy's birthday. Then it will be December, and then it will be baby's birthday. Well, that is supposed to be the order of things. Wow. Time is flying.
The time since I last wrote has been full of pregnancy wonders. I think I am getting a varicose vein in the back of my left leg. Well, let me say this, there is a spot on the back of my left leg that throbs incessantly and unless I was stung I don't know why it is throbbing therefore I think it is a varicose vein trying to venture out. It usually hurts more as the day draws to an end. The stretch marks may be a culprit too. The one on my side have ventured down to meet the ones on my hips and the ones making their way down my inner thigh. It looks like the great migration of little black worms. I think I may have some on the back of my knees too. Not cute. Plus, they are itching now. No fun.
Pregnancy constipation: once again an evil, evil, evil form of torture for a pregnant woman. I do have my suppositories but they aren't necessarily work friendly so therefore there are times when I have to 'grin and bear it' and I do believe that it could be the death of me if it gets any worse. I was actually about to call 9-1-1 the other night from the office because I just knew I was not going to be able to get up from that toilet. I thought I was going to end up having the baby right there as well as crush every single internal organ within me due to the pressure. 45 minutes. 45 minutes. 45 minutes. It took 45 minutes to 'deliver' one simple, yet large, package. 45 minutes. Now, if my whole L&D is only 45 minutes that will be great!
My recent selfish thoughts: Will I be able to wear short skirts again without being one of those women who my simple young mind used to talk about? Will I be able to wear a shirt without worry that my young supposed to be perky chesticles are pointing the right direction and not down towards the floor? Will I still have any chesticles or will they dry up to skin sacks? Will my behind drag and mush in my jeans? Will I always look tired? Will I still get to go out without a care? Will I ever trust anyone besides my mother and myself (Sorry daddy, I remember the baths when I was younger. I could have sworn you were going to drown me just washing my face)? Will I ever be smart again? Will I ever be able to remember my daily agenda without writing it down in permanent ink on my stomach? Will I ever be able to poop in peace again? Will I ever be young again, mature breasts and all?!?!? Someone answer me!!
Oh and by the way, I know I have been promising a picture but let me be real with myself. I don't have time to do anything until Sunday, maybe Saturday (after another 10 hour day at work that is). So, look for something at the beginning of next week. Okay loves?!?!?

September 3: The new six month belly gallery pic is up people! Also, I am sure you noticed the new introduction pics! LOL. That would be baby Jaidan with 3 of her 4 aunts! We all had some fun getting her dressed up for her photo shoot. Check out the Pics page to see more!
It has been a long hard week. 12 hour days each and every day. Six hours today. I am t-i-r-e-d. Worn out, literally.
I got some prune juice today. I pray that it helps me. I need some type of devine intervention. Truly. Anyway, I am tired and not really in the mood to type much of anything. Have a good night.

September 4: Okay, I know that people are asking me where I am registered! I have finally set-up a partial registry!! Yea! I have registered at Target and Babies R Us (Amazon.com). I have no idea how to let people know about the registries. I have not gotten that far in the process yet. Also, I need to sit down with my mother and go through everything because little ol' non-motherly me thought that I would only need about 7 onsies - one per day. Who knew that babies leak?!?! I thought that is what diapers are for!! But I do understand. TiTi, my teacup yorkie can do somethings that make me wonder where it all comes from so I guess babies are the same. They can be literally full of it and it has to go somewhere and I guess the diaper can't hold everything! Not to mention throw up. I was just thinking that I would need to be protected and changed. Not her too!! Anyway, once I get this thing finished, I will send it out or put it up or whatever I need to do.

September 4: Here is the information for the registry....
We've registered with Target baby at Target.com to get ready for our future arrival! You can take a look at our Registry online at http://www.target.com/gp/registry/babyreg.html or visit the Registry kiosk at any Target store!
We have also created a Baby Registry in preparation for our impending arrival Babies"R"Us! You can view our registry at any Babies"R"Us, Toys"R"Us, or Geoffrey retail store. Or, see it online by copying the below URL and pasting it into your browser: http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/XMD466HPY5MT?type=babyreg

September 5: Let me tell you all something, you know how you hear all of these ads talking about cord blood banking?!?!? They make it seem like such a wonderful thing to have and they also make it seem like it is very...affordable. What a joke! It is $1600+ just to get started! Not to mention courier fees and storage fees for the next 25 years! You end up talking about $5000+ for someone to collect a vial of blood from the cord and put it in a fridge. Now, I am sure that in the event that something happens, 5Gs will be nothing in comparision but as of right now looking at the price....I had to second guess the process! I am going to do it though. *Sigh*
Side note, Being Bobby Brown....why!??!?
I got my prune juice people and God's way works better than any other way I have tried thus far! My father suggested milk but alas, I am one of those black folk out there who are not LI or lactose intolerant for those slow ones. I was a little skeptical at first because it took 24 hours to work but boy, it was smooth moves! So note for the preggies out there, get some prune juice! I mixed mine with cranberry juice to get it down. It is not the best looking or tasting beverage in the world! I am going to make sure that I incorporate 5 oz. a day into my diet. I need to make sure that I keep good rectal health. No need in being stretched out in every exit on my body! Just keeping it real....keeping it real....
Anyway, time to try to get up close enough to the sink to wash my hair. This belly keeps me from getting close to the sink, the mirror, my desk, etc. I think I am going to have a permanent sensitive spot on my belly button due my keyboard at work. Anyway, I am off for now people. Take care!
P.S. For those who have asked, the registry is of course, optional. There are other things that are needed (diapers and such) and that would be greatly appreciated!

September 11: It has been a few days since I last updated. I left to go to Texas on the 8th and I came right back on the 9th. That should be my last plane trip for the remainder of the pregnancy. Besides, Texas is still too hot for me!
I go to the doctor on Tuesday for the glucose screening. No sugar at all tomorrow!! What can I eat then?!?! I have no idea. I guess I will have to make sure I make a good breakfast and lunch for tomorrow so I am not tempted by yogurt and fruit and donuts! LOL. It is going to be a long day, I can tell already. I need not slip up though! I don't want to have to go through this again if I fail the test.
Jaidan is getting stronger each day it seems. She did something weird last night. It felt like she was rubbing her head/face or her buttocks on my groin area. I told her to stop trying to get out! It is not time yet. She has to stay in there and grow some more until late November or early to mid December. I also felt a limb going across my upper tummy. It doesn't hurt, it just feels funny! I have no idea how she is oriented in there but I really want to know. I asked my sister to palpate me to find out where her different body parts are but she refused. Yet, she stuck her stomach up to mine and told Jaidan or as she is more commonly know around this household, Mike-Mike, to meet her eggs (i.e. future cousins). I told her to stop molesting me and my child! LOL.
I spoke to my cousin today and she enlightened me about natural birth. She said she had to go through it without medication with her last child because it was too late. She said it hurt to push. I forgot to ask her if the contractions hurt more than the pushing. I always thought the contractions were the bad part and that the pushing was the tiring yet satisfying part. Who would have thunk it. She said it felt like she was about to poop on herself but the nurse said it was just the pressure from the baby on the birth canal. I guess I will see in a few! Now, should I break down and beg for some medicine, someone gently remind me that I wanted to go through this naturally. Honestly, I feel like if I could suffer through the constipation I have had, pre-prunes of course, then I can go through birth atleast to a point! I felt exactly what my cousin was explaining to me when I was trying to pass that big one. Pressure everywhere, back pain, pain in the netherlands and a veritable feeling that I could not push anymore! We shall see soon enough though, as I said before! TTFN!

September 14: Mature breasts update...my areolas have been extra sensitive in the past few weeks as I shared awhile ago. The doctor told me the sensitivity is normal and to just keep bras on to keep my nipples from "perking up" so much. I have followed his orders but now I have another issue. Along with the severe sensitivity, I now have skin peeling/flaking off my areolas! As I sat here wondering if this is normal or emergency hotline type stuff (normal nipples don't shed full layers of skin at once), I decided to check with the omnipotent preggies on the oh so helpful pregnancy chat boards. I was oh so politely informed that preggies go through this right before...DUN DUN DUUUNNNN...nipple leakage!! My nipples are preparing to leak colostrum! Baby's first milk! Do you all know what this means?!?! I have to go get nipple pads! I have to wear pads!! I have not worn a pad of any sort since I was in the 6th grade and now I have to wear nipple pads. Does this also mean no more naked sleeping?!?! Will I 'wet' my bed?!?!? I guess I will have to find out the hard way. I have to relish the next couple of days or weeks...however long I have until I start spraying colostrum everywhere. Why does it have to come out so early? There is no one here to drink it so why is it here? Just in case the baby comes early?!?! Goodness... time is flying too fast!
Anyway, *sigh*, I have been playing a 'game' at the doctor's office since I started and I realized just how insane I am and have decided to share. Basically, everytime you go to the doctor's office you have to give a urine sample so the can check your levels. Well, usually at the doctor's office there are other preggies there who have given urine samples too and usually there is a sample left in the window where you place everything for pickup. I have made it a point to check the last preggy's urine against mine in what I like to call the PEE-PEE WARS!!! LOL. I have a winning streak right now. I always have more urine and my urine is always alot more clear than the next! "I drink more water than you! Nanny nanny boo boo!!" I may be losing in the SCALE WARS but I am SENSEI of the PEE-PEE WARS!! I am able to strut out of the bathroom feeling like I have just found the golden ticket and it is not my golden stream! LOL. Yea me! I am full of water!
Jaidan is doing fine. I am sure she will be completely humiliated after reading these entries when she gets older but she will see. I thought my mother was a weird one for a long time too. Anyway, Jaidan (Mike-Mike) is kicking away especially after that horrid fast from Monday....OMG, I forgot to tell you all!! Well, Monday, I had to completely restrict all sugar (carbs too) intake because I had my glucose screening on Tuesday morning. That was the worst day of my pregnancy! I was irritable, hungry, sleepy, and did I mention hungry! I could bascially only eat eggs and meat! Being on a low sodium diet is not conducive to an egg and meat diet! I HAD to put salt on my eggs (sorry doc) and I had to get some good ol' salty meats! But then, by the end of the night, I did not want anything but sugar! On top of that, I had to fast for the last 12 hours before going to the doctor. I think they wanted me to pass out on the drive to the office! I sipped a bit of water to get me there (and my urine was still more clear than the next!) and then I had to drink that nasty syrup of a glucose drink. That killed my sugar desires for a second. I knew to the minute when I was to get my blood drawn and that had me freaked out. So freaked out the when the doctor pulled out the measuring tape to measure my fundus height I tensed up. I saw the shiny end and thought it was a needle! I thought he was about to put a needle in my tummy! No thank you! Side note - I have been measuring a little big from the start and I have or shall I say, Jaidan has kept up with that trend. I have only gained 2 pounds this time, which is good for me! Back to the story... so after getting three tubes of my ruby red vitality juice sucked from my arm, I got to leave and I rushed to drop my sister off and make it into Virginia so that I could go to Dunkin Doughnuts! LOL. I got a bowl of soup and a dozen doughnuts! I did not eat all of them myself! I won't say how many I did eat though! ;) LOL. Of course by this time, I am on pass out status because I need something going through my blood and Jaidan is kicking the heck out of me because she is hungry I guess. All morning long she was very active. "Feed me woman! Feed me!!", that is what I imagined her saying with each kick. After I ate, she calmed down. I never want to have to do that again as long as I am pregnant!
Last bit before I go...as you all know, I try to stay 'hair free' due to my not so balanced pH. Well, I can no longer see the important areas so I have to go by feel. It is alot easier to shave up (against the hair growth) to make sure that the 'goodness' stays in place and doesn't get cut off. Well, this just makes for ingrown hairs and boy did I learn my lesson! I got a major ingrown hair right next to the goodness and believe me, that kind of soreness is transferable! So for everyone out there with a pregnant friend who, like me, has to shave to keep from offending herself and her friends, please offer to lend a helping hand and shave for her!! Don't allow her to nick the goodness or end up with an ingrown hair!

September 15: Everyone....I found another use for female pubic hair. If you only thought it was a beatification point, a cute mini fro for your nether regions...think again!! It is used to help direct the stream of urine! I am sure that it also keeps out stuff like eyelashes do. I just thought I would share. I may have told you all this before. I had another incident/accident with that though. I think the back of my pants leg is dry now. :( LOL

September 17: Hello people. Jaidan is doing fine. She is continuing to grow and move about causing me some discomfort. I don't know what people mean when they say they love being pregnant. I mean, it is a wonderful experience but whether I can say I love being pregnant...I am not quite sure about that one. I do love feeling the baby move. I thought I would hate the feeling. It is weird at times and uncomfortble at times but it is a wonderful feeling the rest of the time!! I just wish I could control it. She seems to like to poke at my pelvic bones now. That is a funny feeling when you are sitting down.
Anyway, on to the newest discovery in my oh so normal/weird pregnancy.
Back on the topic of stretchmarks, I have found some new ones. No one would ever guess where they are located and honestly I cannot even explain how in the world they got there! There are in the crack of my behind! LOL. Now you all wonder how I discovered this...let me tell you. So, the other night my cousin had a birthday party. Of course I got a little bit of my dance on because the DJ was throwing it down DC style for real...and I got a little sweaty. The drive home wasn't long enough for me to completely dry out especially in certain areas. Well, we get home and I take off everything so I can head on into the bathroom and take care of my funk. I notice that the crack of my behind is a little itchy and I start to worry about a rash due to the sweaty ride home. I know, hypochondriac. Anyway, so I turn around in the mirror and gently part my cheeks to discover yet another worm trail. How in hades did I get stretch marks in the crack of my behind?!?!? I do have stretch marks in my butt cuff but none one my butt. Well none from pregnancy, just faded ones from puberty. How did they get in the crack of my behind and not on my behind?!??! Did my crack stretch due to my 45 minute delivery?!?! Of course I had to show everyone including my grandmother and another one of my cousins. I need to know if anyone has ever seen anything like this. Please leave a message in my guest journal if you know the cause of this. I am serious people. I need to know an answer! I will upload pictures if anyone needs to see exactly what I mean!

September 19: Do you think that I should maybe add a disclaimer to this site?!?!?
"WARNING - Enter only if you really want to know what goes on in the life and mind of a pregnant woman!"
I feel like I am going to burst. I know I have a way to go and I am going to only get bigger but I still feel like I can not grow anymore. I am full to capacity!

September 20: Hello everyone. I think I may be unfit to be a mother. So, I leave work early to go pick up my baby sister to take her to the dentist. We came home first so she could brush her teeth and get her records. I decided to put the greens that I had started cooking last night on to finish cooking since I was at home early. The dentist office is only about 5 minutes away and I was coming right back so I figured I could leave them on. My sister wasn't done by the time I got the greens started so I pulled out the leftover lasagna to make a plate because I was starving. She came down right then so I set the lasagna on the stove and we left. I was back in about 20 minutes (I stopped to get gas) and I open the door to find the house full of smoke. I started panicking because I did not hear the dogs barking and I could not see through the smoke. The smoke detector wasn't going off either. So anyway, I completely forget about my life and the baby's life and I run inside because I need to try to get the dogs and put the fire out if there is a fire. Luckily, there was no fire just a whole house full of smoke from smoldering plastic and metal. I melted a fork! I cried on the phone with my mother. How can I stay at home alone with a baby when I can't even take care of myself?!?!? I locked myself out yesterday and today I almost burned the house down. What tomorrow?!? I am the perfect idiot - can pregnancy brain really make you turn into a complete dummy?

September 30: I know that I have not updated in 10 days! It is the end of the Fiscal year for the government and being that my job is production based, I have been grinding to make sure that I will continue to have a job and healthcare and income for baby! My life is hers now. I have to provide for her and forget about me. LOL.
Anyway, nothing much has changed. I did gain 6 pounds in 2 weeks which is not good but other than that my vitals are excellent so the doctor had nothing to say about it. It is probably the water weight again since I have been out and about more than I have been resting. I keep saying that I am going to rest more starting next week. Well, that will be put off again. LOL. I have too much stuff to do between now and her arrival.
for all of those who have inquired, yes I know I sent out registry information without shower information but that is till in planning to my knowledge. I believe that shower will be on November 12 at my home. I am not sure about the time nor am I sure when the invitations will be sent (evite or snail mail) but I will update the site once they go out.
Jaidan has taken to rubbing her behind up high in my tummy making me quite uncomfortable. When she rubs her behind up there and kicks at the same time that is really uncomfortable. She is having fun and working on her motor skills so no complaints. I have only doubled over in pain once from her blows so I guess she is fine. I asked the doctor if "she could hit anything and accidentally reboot any of my organs" and he laughed and told me no, after launching into a little mini-lecture about the fact that I must be a "computer person" and that the human body cannot be rebooted or upgraded etc. Even though I do disagree because House did reboot that little girl that Chance kissed. LOL. I guess I cannot complain about his comment since I am at this very moment updating a web log "blog" about my pregnancy. Am I a dork? Will my child be affected by my love for anything that can provide interference in my body?!?! Electrical interference that is. LOL. Wow, I need to read something besides a patent.
The leukorrhea (look it up) has actually increased. Who knew that it could get worse? It is actually more manageable now though. I know it will be there so I can handle it better. I have not started "leaking" as I thought I would. I guess I was just shedding breast skin. I do have something that looks like a milk plug though. Everything is too tender to try to get it out. I just let it stay and work its heavenly course. Other than that... let's see. I am 31 weeks which means that I am in the single digits are far as weekly countdown goes. 9 weeks until due date but only 7 weeks until full term. I am having a baby ya'll!!! Wow! Am I serious?!?!? Are you serious?!?! LOL. I still have as of yet to buy anything for the baby. I still have not rearranged my room or child proofed the house. I need to get on it. I know. I will...next week.....

October 4: I am basically tired of being pregnant. I feel bad. I have no more room in me. There is no more room for the baby to grow. There is no more room for me to eat. There is no room for me to "create waste". THERE IS NO MORE ROOM! I feel full constantly. I feel like I want to vomit constantly. I need something to be on the way out of my body whether it be baby, urine, poop, gas or my food. I don't want to throw up all the time but if it means relieving some pressure, I am all for it.
There has not been much of a change in my body in my opinion but I guess I am growing. Jaidan is growing, I know that. She is running out of room to throw jabs and punches and all of those flying kicks! She is still an active baby though. I just need her to stop being active in my groin area! That is the worst feeling. I go to the bathroom and empty my bladder and I guess that means it is time to play to her because she starts doing something down there which makes me feel like I have to go again even when there is nothing there! I have to sit down to get her to leave my bladder alone. She has been out of school for the past two weeks since her school's power went out (the batteries died). School should be back up and running in the morning though! Get ready Jaidan, music and milk in the morning on the way across the bridge!
Right now she is doing some stretches or some fancy form of fluid yoga. I have no idea. She is trying to get out I think. Building up her strength to break through my uterine walls in the wrong direction. It feels like that to me at least...
Anyway, I forgot to update on yet another scene from my perfect idiot, pregnant brain life. Last week on Wednesday, it was very chilly up here (40 F). I was trying to get to work early since we were coming up on the end of the fiscal year so I was out the door at 630. I got in the car and started it up so I could get the window defrosters going and then I got out to get the umbrella out of the trunk so I could wipe the other windows down enough for me to get on the road. I then proceeded to close the door to the car to get to the side window and the car locked. (It automatically locks when it is started and all doors are closed.) The other key was 40 minutes away with my little sister in college. I attempted to jimmy the lock while snot and tears froze on my face for the next hour. I couldn't even leave with someone else's car while they waited for the key to be brought down because I had locked all of my things in the car. Every single piece of identification, my office keys, my garage pass for work, my money and check and credit cards...everything. I waited for another 2 hours for the key to get there. I cried for one hour then ate some cereal and watched TV in the second hour. I felt like a "Class A Class - without the cl". Dumb me. As I walked in the house crying, my sister proceeds to tell me that it is okay and that it is just my pregnant brain. LOL. How can people be dumb pregnant and then magically get really smart when they have the baby?!?!
Other than that, things have been okay. I took my glucose test 2 weeks ago. I forgot to mention the results. Passed it, got an A. LOL. Just kidding, the doctor said that the results were "perfect".
I think that is all. I still have not gotten started with the baby preparations. I know I need to because the next two months time are not guaranteed. I just need one more week though....

October 6: Jaidan had her first round of hiccups yesterday. Well, the first round that I could feel. At first I started freaking out thinking she was having a seizure in utero (is that even possible?) and then I remembered that the hiccups start/increase about now as the baby starts to practice swallowing. She got them again this morning and one more 'gin this afternoon. The cuteness of it all has passed. LOL. Last night they lasted for about 20 minutes and this morning for about 10 minutes. This afternoon they only lasted for about 5 minutes. It feels like she is jumping/jerking just a little bit in time. It is kind of annoying after a while though. I know she must get annoyed too. I hate hiccups so she has to too. LOL.
I feel very unattractive at this moment. My sister and my officemate laughed at my pants today. They aren't very flattering, I admit but dag on it, I have no other choice! They are meant to be over the belly but that annoys me and Jaidan so I tucked them below my belly which caused them to be slightly saggy on me bum and also it gave the appearance of a "penile member" due to the bunching saggy part in the front. My shirt was not large enough to button over my belly so I had to put a tank top on under it and wear it open but my tank top wants to ride up and lose itself in my belly/breast fold so I end up with the bottom half of my belly being exposed unless I constantly tug my shirt back down. It is not a tight shirt; it just likes to hide in my belly/breast fold I guess. Plus, the pant show off my newly formed cellulite a little too much. But, it was either wear this or "winterize" my summer wardrobe. I got called out on that the other day though so I am going with my other options.
Anyway, as I walked from the car to my building today, I almost busted a vein in my head! I was walking briskly to try to increase my heart rate a bit to make sure I get a little bit of exercise in but I think I overdid it! I felt like crap by the time I got on the elevator and I had to keep pacing to make sure that I did not pass out. How cute would that be? And knowing the people here at my office, several people probably would have just stepped over me lying there passed out in the elevator and proceeded on with their day! Ha! I need to pin my emergency instructions to my bra so just in case...
I was reading up on the GBS test (group B strep) and I came across some information regarding a possible anal probe. I am not down with the anal probe. The preggies on the message board said that it is just a quick swab but still... I need at least 1 month advance notice before you do anything invasive near me bum! The doctor mentioned that I would have the test around 34 or 35 weeks but he said it was a quick vaginal swab....nothing was mentioned or hinted about my anus and possible invasive measures. Now, maybe some doctors leave the bum area alone but of course now I am going to be paranoid and all clinched up until I am sure that he does not go anywhere near my rectal area with means to enter it! That will probably make me nervous which in turn will lead to gas production since that is my nervous response in life which in turn will lead to me passing gas on his finger or swab or stick or whatever since he has entered my bum!! ARRGGGHHH!!!!

October 11: Well, I had my 50 millionth doctors appointment today. I gained the correct amount of weight this time, 2 pounds - up to 182 (I know...egads!!), and my blood pressure is a magnificent 110/70! Jaidan is doing fine! Her heartbeat is at 156 beats per minute...probably because the doctor was pushing on her to feel where she is situated. She is head down with her back over to my right side, feet kicking my ribs and hands punching my sides. I could have told him that though. She got me really good in my left side last night!

October 19: I am ready to give birth!! I am so not feeling like this weight is "happy happy joy joy" weight anymore! I do want baby girl to be healthy and happy and fully capable of life outside my uterus but I need a break from the weight! My back is killing me. I have so much pressure in my netherlands that I can no longer tell if I have to really go to the bathroom or if it is just baby resting on me. The pressure gets so bad at night sometimes that I just can't walk. I did have a few days of contractions last week. They started up mostly in the evenings and would go for hours. The pressure would increase and the contractions would wash over my body minutes apart. Nothing too painful but definitely not fun. The doctor said I just need to rest more and that I am too stressed and on my feet too much. I wish I could just lay in bed all day. I am sure I would get tired of it all though.
I did take some more pictures of my new larger than life self to upload. I have to wait until I get to a computer where I can rework my page though. My files are all on a computer that has possibly been lost to a virus, sadly. I can upload the pics into my photo gallery though. Right now, I just don't have the mind power to work the coding otherwise. I apologize people.
My next doctor's visit is on the 25th. I am not sure when I move on to weekly visits but I do hope it is soon. I need to see an end in sight. I need to drop a mucous plug or something. Something to let me know that there is something going on down there besides massive discharge manufacturing. I am guessing that the weight gain that is registering on my face and the constant back pain are signs but I want more, more, more!! Not too soon but soon enough. A mucous plug is nothing too bad. It just means my cervix is getting soft and ready instead of it being firm and thick!
I feel like I have a 9 pound child in my tummy not a tiny 4.5 pound still developing child! No one told me that I would feel like I want to rip my tummy off! No one told me that I would want labor so badly that I can push the thought of pain to the side and actually welcome it! Well, that may be going a little far. I want a nice 2 hour labor.... 1.75 hours of dilation and effacement and 0.25 hours of pushing baby and placenta too! I want to breast feed immediately and I want to bathe ASAP after that. Should I poop myself during labor I want no one to speak of it...ever!! That will be between me and God! Now, it will be footage on the tape but hopefully that will all be edited out before the copies are sent to all of my friends and family.
No more updates for today unless I should get on later. However...it is ANTM night so I will be glued to a TV sitting on my now plumper than ever rear end!!

October 26: I know it has been a while since I have been on here once again. Life is coming at me fast and I cannot stop it nor do I have the energy to try to slow it down! LOL.
Anyway, I had a doctor’s appointment yesterday that went totally wrong. Wrote a story about it…like to hear it? Here it goes: First, I am in the shower prepping myself for the day and I hear on the radio that a truck has overturned on the beltway spilling seafood everywhere so traffic is rerouted which means…back-up!! I rush to get out of the shower and get dressed so I could prayerfully make it up the road in time to my appointment. I immediately hit traffic once I get out of the neighborhood and it take me 40 minutes to get to another street that will lead me through the back roads to the highway. Of course I have not eaten nor do I have any water so I am freaking out and hungry; Jaidan is going crazy because she wants food and is not likely my little adrenaline rush on an empty tummy. I finally make it to the highway and get up to a safe but relatively fast speed (did I mention it is raining also?) only to hit the seafood truck traffic about 5 miles from my exit. I creep along debating on whether to call the doctor’s office and beg them to see me even if I am late (I did not want to have to do this again the next day should they cancel my appointment) or whether I should just turn around and head on to work. I decided to stay the course and fortunately, I made it just at the 15-minute grace period mark. I signed in, gave my sample (I peed, excuse me, urinated (I am a mom now so I have to be PC) all over my hand since I can’t see past my belly and then to top it off there were no other samples for the pee-pee, I mean, urine wars **sigh**) and sat down to try and get my blood pressure back to normal. Shortly thereafter, I was called in to the exam room and told to strip….whoa!! (I completely forgot that the exam was supposed to be an internal one! I rushed out the house and did a minimal job with the lotion, which meant that my stretch marked rear was also ashy!) I get my weight and BP done and then take my place on the table nakey and ashy. The doctor comes in and looks at my feet kind of strange so I let him know I am super ashy. Of course, he looks at me like I am crazy and asks me what I mean by ashy. It was a Caucasian man but I didn’t think ashy was a term meant only for those of the darker toned races because I have seen some ashy white folk! Anyway, I explain to him that I am lacking moisture in my skin and he laughs at me and promises he won’t look. I am thinking, yeah right…you are about to peruse my ashy genitals! Anyway, he asks me the common questions and I give him the not so standard answers, which can only come from infamous me. One of the answers was, “I think she has claws” to which he immediately looks at me in awe and states that that is a “fine way to describe your daughter, ‘she has claws’!” Now, come on. I did not mean it like, “she is deformed and is growing talons” I meant it as, “she is scratching the bejesus out of me from the inside or at least it feels like that!” It is too late though. The tone has been set for the rest of the appointment. After he checks out my back, checks position and listens to the heartbeat he asks me to scoot on down and put my feet in the holsters so he can get to work. As I start to scoot down I get a major cramp in my right hamstring so I grab my leg and start yelling “Charlie Horse” to which he just stares and me as I agonize. After letting me roll around for about 15 seconds, he grabs my legs and forces back into the holsters and apart. Can you say, OWWWW?!!??! It shocked me into submission. I was completely shocked. He then took my drape and threw it up on my tummy and got right to work, not worrying about causing my any kind of discomfort, etc. My leg finally calmed down and after he walked out to get some paperwork, I was able to get down and get dressed. I felt so violated though and I knew right then that I do not want that man delivering my child. He is not my regular OB but he is one of the ones who could be on call when I go into labor. What did I do to him?!?!
**SIGH** Life. That is all I can say. Life. On to other subjects… 5 weeks left. I am ready for birth yet scared. I had a couple of contraction like pains again on Sunday. Let me tell you something…do not talk to me when I go into labor because if it is worse that what I felt on Sunday, I just may say something that is ungodly to you if you say the wrong thing to me!! That was pure pain. I am still saying that I am not going to ask for the epidural but…
The ECP is back and it is worse than ever! I know things were stretching out before but now they are stretching and they are very loose. I can throw my leg out of socket almost. At least that is what it feels like. I have to be careful standing up or swiveling myself in the chair. My legs just do what they want and they pay me with pain when I don’t comply!

October 31: It is Halloween and I am hiding inside from the candy hunting children of the world. My back is killing me. I am swollen (full of water) once again even though I have been avoiding excess sodium and drinking plenty of water. I have had 100 ounces today already and I have about 2 more hours to go before I go to bed so I am sure I will get at least another 16-24 ounces in my body. Obviously, I have put on weight but now I am scared about how much weight the baby has put on. A very knowledgable medical student told me that the weight I should have put on (around 25 pounds) should have been about 45% baby. If the weight I have put on (57 pounds) is indicative of the weight of the child....good LORD!!! I may not be able to get this baby out! I DO NOT WANT A C-SECTION!!! I want a vaginal birth but not a crack some bones open, rip some sensitive flesh, forever ruin me type of vaginal birth! I mean, as long as the baby is healthy, I am fine but ... I want to make sure I am not too sore to function as a mom!!

November 8: RETROACTIVE NEWS FLASH!!! ***JAIDAN ISRAEL*** is the new name!!! Her father decided he wanted a middle name that begins with a vowel and he chose Israel. We went back and forth for a couple days but he won out! LOL. I really love the name though. This is a retroactive addition since so many people have been questioning the name change.

November 10: I swear I updated this page since November started (forget the retroactive addition from the 8th)! I am losing it! I have so much going on right now trying to get ready for baby and finishing up loose ends at work. I am stressing out though! I have too much to do and no time plus my mind ain't right! LOL. I had an appointment yesterday, still no dilation. :( Time will keep passing with no baby on the outside of me! I was able to get an ultrasound to see her though! She is beautiful. She was sucking on her hand and she had a foot up by her head too. Now, I am not sure that is the most comfortable position, but whatever makes her happy. I will not give her estimated weight just in case people who plan on coming to the shower try to cheat when guessing the baby's weight. That is also why I am not telling my weight either! Anyway, I will add more on later. I need to get alot done before I go crazy in here!

November 13: The shower was yesterday. It was an absolutely magical experience. Now all who know me know that that is a very strong statement coming from me! I tend to avoid "flowery" terms. LOL. There were many people there and the food was absolutely delicious! Jaidan got alot of gifts! She can definitely come out now! The only big thing missing is her crib. That will make it here though. She can sleep in the bassinet in the mean time! I will put the shower pictures up and a better shower description later on. I have to go in to work. :(

November 19: I am a big fat miserable lady who happens to have a baby in my womb! LOL. It is exactly two weeks until my due date. Well, Jaidan’s due date…I am more than ready! She needs to get ready too so she can go ahead and enter this world ASAP!! I can no longer stand for too long without the weight of my belly causing excruciating back pain. I have my belly bra which is a tremendous help but it is also a danger. I was wearing it earlier today with my oh so cool velour shorts that my family bought me so that I can limit my nudity and as I bent down to wipe up a mess on the floor the Velcro dug some tracks into my thighs as my belly rested there! I kept wondering why my leg hurt and then I lifted and twisted and saw the big red raised scratches and realized that I must have cut myself when I was cleaning! I do remember the velcro being stuck to my shorts but I guess the pain did not register through the heavy labor I was doing! LOL. I breathe hard with any amount of physical exertion at this point. I can not imagine feeling like this forever. I am more than ready to get into the gym and make sure that I have a healthy physically fit body once again because this whole heavy breathing just from walking up a flight of stairs is for the birds!
Jaidan got another letter from her father. He writes her more than he writes me now! I don’t know if I should be jealous or not. Well, I guess I should get used to it. She will be the little lady of his life now and I am the old woman. LOL. I guess I will have to just understand. She does go crazy every time I read a letter from him to her and when I am on the phone with him and when I am even just thinking about him. She loves her daddy, obviously! LOL. I guess she got that from me. ;)
Anyway, shower details!! The shower was absolutely fabulous! It was co-ed as planned and went well. The guys were a tad bit nervous at first but they warmed up to the festivities and it was a great experience!! Everyone who brought a pack of diapers was entered into a raffle. Then we also had a belly cast that everyone signed and a “How I Met the Mom” book and a “Words of Wisdom” book. My older sister and my twin cooked up some jerk, lemon pepper and plain baked chicken with rice, spiral ham, honey glazed carrots, green beans, mac and cheese, artichoke and spinach dip, egg rolls, and a veggie tray for starters. Dessert was fudge brownies, mint brownies, chocolate mousse filled cake (decorated with pics of me and Freddy as babies), banana pudding, ice cream and a fresh fruit tray. There was lemonade, tea, soda and water to wet the whistle! It was a grand occasion! I got to eat my food, cold, after running around trying to make sure that I greeted everyone and gave them some special time. It was still good though! The games then started up! “Don’t say Baby (or Jaidan)” was the first game to get going. Everyone was given a pin and if they said Jaidan or baby, they had to give up their pin to whoever caught them. Needless to say, I was pinless within ten minutes or so. I was even in pin debt to be honest! LOL. My uncle and cousin tied for a win on that one with six pins each. The other game was “Guess the Girth” where I was measured around my belly with ribbon and then everyone had a chance to cut a piece of ribbon that they thought would fit around me. The precut piece was taken around and the person with the closest cut was the winner. My aunt won that one and everyone else just thought I was a huge house! LOL. I was amazed by the lengths so people went to … literally! Anyway, the next game was “Guess the Weight (baby birth weight and mom’s weight gain as of that day)” Let’s just say that the numbers ranged from I think 20 pounds to 85 pounds for me….Another aunt was dead on with my 63 pound weight gain for a win on that game. LOL. Whoever wins Jaidan’s side of the game is to be seen sometime soon I hope and pray! There was also a fun way to get everyone over to the gift table for the opening of the gifts. Everyone had to say what they were bringing to the “party”. The trick was that they needed to “bring something” that started with the same letter their name starts with. Let’s just say that I love my friends and family for their genuine good souls and not their brains! LOL. Half of the people got it fast and the other half kept trying to throw out some crazy things to get over to the gift side of the room. Everyone of course was eventually invited and we began the present unwrapping! Jaidan got so much stuff! There was of course, the stroller and car seat, a swing, a vibrating papasan, a play yard, almost 700 diapers, plenty of onsies and sleepers, little dresses, safety stuff, towels, an infant bath tub, bottle and food warmers, a breast pump, bottles, a bottle drying rack, socks, blankets, scrap-booking stuff, a cute little engraved photo book and bank, medicine kit, a little Spanish learning library, a boppy pillow, some suction snack bowls, a growth chart, a foot and hand print frame and gift cards! Jaidan is set to enter this world and live for some time without me having to leave the house beyond doctor’s visits! Thank you everyone!! To finish the evening up, there was a poem game on the tables that the persons at the table had to play to decide who got to take the centerpiece gift home (either a candle or candy jar that had a strip of paper with a ribbon that read, every time you light/open me, say a prayer for Jaidan). Everyone helped get the church cleaned up and everything packed into the car and the magical evening was over! I was able to get a picture with everyone who came (and stayed long enough) and with every single gift! There are almost 400 pictures from the evening as well as video footage. Jaidan will love it! Also, there are still packages coming in from those who were unable to make it. Jaidan got a diaper bag, a bottle drying rack, more blankets, a robe, and a secure sleeper so she can sleep in the bed with me without worry. Thank you everyone.

November 20: Okay, I have had some contractions once again but nothing else. No mucous plug, no dilation...nothing. I was experiencing some brief but sharp pains in my cervix area last night but I am not sure if that was the baby trying to stick a hand out or trying to go ahead and engage. Who knows. I need to see some type of labor progress. Some type of something going on to let me know that something will be happening soon! My cousin who was due two days before me had her baby on Tuesday. Why am I still waiting on this child?!?!? LOL. I know, I know...she is not ready. I understand but I am still impatient. I do have to admit that when I thought it was something going on with the pains last night, I was kind of scared. LOL. Labor is something that I want but that moment actually getting here kind of put a little bit of fear in me! I have too much to do at work over the next 2-3 days for anything to pop off for real just yet. Monday the 28th will be a good day! LOL.
I am sitting here trying to finish this entry and my sisters are yelling at me to open my legs so that they can "talk to Jaidan" and coax her down the canal. They keep yelling "Jaidan, come here Jaidan!" My sister got that idea yesterday because she was standing to the right of me and she yelled "come out Jaidan!" and then Jaidan moved some large body part from my left side over to the right side, right on cue as if she understood. Pure coincidence, but of course now, everyone feels the need to yell into my vagina to see if Jaidan will move on down the birth canal.
The calls to ask me if the baby has come yet have started. I have been asked about my bloody show more times than I care to share. Believe me people, there is no need to worry...unless everything progresses faster than I can blink, I will make sure that an entry is put up on the site and that a mass email is sent to everyone letting you all know that it is on - Jaidan is on the way!!

November 27: No baby yet. :( At my last doctor's appointment, I was once again told that my cervix is still long, firm and thick. I was also told again that I have a narrow pelvis opening and that a vaginal birth may be difficult. I kept asking them if they "saw these hips on me" and I was told that my hips have nothing to do with the bone structure on the inside. I just have huge pelvis bones I guess. Huge pelvis bones that almost meet in the middle. Should my bones not flex open enough and should Jaidan's head not flex closed enough, we are both in for a time. The spoke the hated words... c-section... They told me that they just wanted to let me know just in case I don't progress through with a vaginal labor that they will go ahead and recommend a surgical removal of my child from my body. That is one thing that I do not agree with at all. I know there have to be some women with some narrow pelvis openings who have delivered children fine. I just don't want anyone to get c-section happy (more money for them, more controlled situation, faster) and decide to get me on out of that room. I want the chance to deliver this child without the stress of c-section on my mind. I will be stressed enough, I am sure. Should I not go into labor naturally, they are talking about inducing labor sometime on the 12th or the 13th. That is too long to wait! Jaidan better go ahead and come out on her own. I need her to come on out quickly and vaginally. Of course I want her safely out, above all, but I am going to claim exactly what I want and that is a tear/cut free, quick, non-induced vaginal birth!
I return to the doctor on Tuesday at 4 pm. I pray that my cervix has shortened, softened and opened up a bit by that point. I have all of the natural methods that are supposed to get your cervix to "ripen" but I am having trouble getting a few of them taken care of. The top suggestions are sex (that is what got me here in the first place and Freddy ain't no where near here and I refuse to have some other man's semen on OUR child (The semen will still be there for at least 7 days should I go into labor in that time) so...that is a no go); evening primrose oil either taken orally, inserted into the vagina or used to massage the perineal area and the cervix; fresh pineapple, eaten of course; and/or physical exercise. I have been trying to get the physical exercise going. That is difficult when you can't breath. I have not gotten the fresh pineapple or evening primrose oil yet..that is due to my forgetful mind. I already gave the reason why sex is a no go. So, hopefully, by Tuesday afternoon something will have changed with my cervix. Then we can all really start the countdown! Until then...take care!
Oh yeah, I have pictures of me playing Twister from Thanksgiving...I will upload those once I get them from my father. Let's just say...it was...interesting. LOL.

December 4: Jaidan is officially past due. I am sick. Literally. Sick. LOL. I feel like I have arthritis, my gums bleed like I ate every piece of candy in America on Halloween last year and did not brush my teeth at all, I get up to urinate 4 or more times a night, I feel nauseous, and the list goes on. Not to mention I still am working, people keep calling, emailing, and text messaging to find out if I had the baby and then when I say no they proceed to give their opinion on how the rest of my preganancy and the birth will play out. Thank you kindly but I am dealing with enough myself. Keep your negativity to yourself. If you are not claiming something positive for me and this child then don't speak! I am stressed and frustrated on top of the aches and pains so I really don't have a jolly nature to brush everything off right now. I see why people who are past their due date start getting snippy and panicky. Crazy people in their lives drive them to madness too! If you mean anything to me, I will make sure that you know as soon as possible after her birth! I promise!
As far as the lay out for things, I have an ultrasound scheduled for Wednesday to check the bio-physical profile, I have another appointment on Thursday to do the non-stress test to make sure she is doing okay in there, then should she not appear before the 12th, I go in for cervix ripening at 3 p.m. and then at 8 a.m. on the 13th they will induce labor. Induction of labor means they will put me on pitocin which should make me have contractions...it does not mean "oh, so they are going to cut her out?". So anyway, all in all, she should definitely be here in the next 9 days if not sooner! Take care people!
JAIDAN COME OUT PLEASE!!

Belly Gallery (Months 1-9)
You have to use the arrows to scroll over to see all of the pictures now!

Belly Gallery - Yes, I will be in the same lingerie each month!
Except Month 5 :(
Month 6.5 was renamed month 7 because I did not take a month 7 picture. Month 8 and 9 were uploaded after much manipulation!! LOL. I had some programming issues...

Fun Facts about Baby ?

My Birthstone is Turquoise (Prosperity)
My Flower is Narcissus or Holly (Indigo, Green, Greenish-Blue)
My Astrological Sign is Sagittarius
I'll be born in the Chinese Year of The Rooster
I will start kindergarten in 2011,
be old enough to drive a car in 2021,
and will graduate High School with the Class of 2024
See who else was born on my due date!